i lie here, searching for something intangible beneath my skin. my soul. it occurs to me that i might not have one.

all my life i have felt different from the pack. a lone predator amongst a field of sheep. i do not feel how they feel. i do not know how they feel.

i always said there is no such thing as good or evil. maybe though, there is just no such thing as good or evil for me.

maybe every emotion ive ever expressed is just a desire to feel something in the first place. maybe every cut is an attempt to dig through my skin and find out who i am on the inside.

i am not like you. i'm better. and i wont apologise for that fact. i have given up so much humanity to be this dark goddess that the price for my superiority is indeed my soul.

i tried to be a sheep. i am not a sheep. and i can't hide anymore, i dont want to.