I don't know when you'll need to read this, but one thing is for sure, there will be some point when you'll need to read it. At that point you'll be rock bottom and feel completely alone in this world. Well biatch, you ain't alone. Lets look at this factually, you have far too many friends to keep in touch with, let alone ever to be alone if you want to be. In fact sometimes it can be kind of annoying, because you hate saying "no", so you say "yes" and go along to things with your friends you never really wanted to do in the first place. But that's ok, because usually you have a great time. You have great friends. Choosing to spend less time with them and more time on your book and fitness is a conscious decision. And yeah, it will mean being alone more, but ultimately it will get you the future you want. Imagine that, a published author and military officer? It's worth it! In the end your dreams really can come true.
Now, I know what else you're thinking. You feel unloved. You feel like everyone else is in love and you're not, and it makes you sad because it brings back happy memories of the times you were in love. Well, thankfully you're NOT in love, because if you were you wouldn't want to join the military, you wouldn't want to be away from home for long periods of time, you'd just want to be with your boyfriend. Well screw that, you've done love too many times. You've given everything and got nothing back except a broken heart and broken promises. Fuck love. Maybe one day you will meet someone, or maybe you already met someone but the time just isn't right. You owe yourself a couple of years to sort your head out, pick your heart up and get your career sorted. Love just complicates things. Loneliness hurts sometimes, just like missing Dave hurts. But you owe it to yourself to conquer that.
You've got everything to live for, your life is just getting started, you are going to change the world, you know you have it in you. Just don't give up.
Love B x
