the facade

i feel like I can’t maintain the facade any longer, that i may just start to show through. i wish i knew what was wrong. maybe something about how stupid my whole life is. i don’t know. why does the rest of the world put up with the hypocrisy, the need to put a happy face on sorrow, the need to keep on keeping on? i don’t know the answer, i know only that I can’t. i don't want any more vicissitudes, i don't want any more of this try, try again stuff. i just want out. i’ve had it. i am so tired. i am twenty three and i am already exhausted